hahah

i was havin an incredibly horrible night until i saw this

heidi and spencer on their honeymoon in Mexico..oh what idiots!

if you have the money and are soo worried that you'd nicely compliment your fake boobs with a mask dont you think honeymooning in a less infected area would be a better idea

oh man...i dont even know these people yet i'm tryin to reason with them

what a waste..but i got a laugh

oh brother

so today was my first day of feeling pregnant..i'm starting to show a little bit and although i went down a pants size i cant help but notice this puge on my stomach growing from its already protruding size..i wore this shirt today that I knew I'd would later regret wearing..and yep. all day i felt like people were like.." is she pregnant or is she just fat?" woo hoo. Rachy and I went and took pictures together today. Last week I met this lady who is a photographer and she wanted to take pictures of my belly as it gets bigger and then of the baby when he or she comes. And just so you know Bethany I did this for you! I know you want belly pictures and frankly I just feel weird taking pictures of my stomach. Rachy came cuz I thought you needed some pictures of her too :) But once I get some of those pictures I'll put them on here so you can check them out..
Pregnancy Status: I am 4 months and 2 days pregnant and I still havent gained any weight..(I'm not worried cuz I hear that being pregnant can make you fat, one of the many things i have learned from Britney) I find out if this baby is a she or a he on May 20th, which is quite exciting. I along with everyone else want a girl...and before i thought it was a boy...now I'm not so sure. But I do have some names picked out..Avery or Eliot for a girl and Ezekiel for a boy.. I like Emerson for a girl too but I think its too manly and i like Sawyer Hill for a boy but that might be too celebrity like..i dunnoo..It's obvious to me that naming a dog is much easier then a child haha...but once i know if its a he or a she that should be easier..

Overall things are good... I'm havin little moments of freaking out...and big moment of worry but I hope to God that the come less frequently. I think i need to start writing my life so its not stuck in my head..haunting me. Somewhere private.. but then again maybe I dont wanna be that honest with myself anyways haha

3 months

Baby at 8 wks 4 days. I am offically 3 months and for some crazy reason i thought that would mean that this morning sickness would magically disappear. Being wrong has never made me feel so sick! I am supposed to go to the dr's this week and have an ultrasound but i dont think i can cuz i might not have insurance while my dad is on strike. He doesnt know if he's on strike but chances are he is and will be when i'm supposed to go to dr's. Oh well. Easter is coming up and i have fun family coming into town so thats exciting. I am struggling to comprehend why i am paying for rent in burbank. It completely fustrates me to the point where i have nightmares about it. My dreams lately consist of not liking some people right now, a brown haired baby and high school.I dont know where high school comes into play but thats usually the setting of my dreams these days. My parents are in the process of getting ready to sell their house, which i am still shocked they want to do, so everything is getting painted and cleaned. Its kinda exciting but scary at the same time. I would like a clean slate to decorate for baby and get my living space organized. I wish Bethany was here. I really miss her a lot, to the point where i fight back tears thinkin about it. I so wish she could be here with me with all these changes I'm going through. But i am so happy that shes only a phone call away. Im goin to hang out with Rachy soon, which i love. I can be lazy and tired with her and she doesnt mind. In fact we both always have so much to bitch about that hanging out consist of driving around listenin to taylor swift and pointing out everyone who we dislike that day. I was thinking i would like to have another black and white party...i want more money so i can buy a private jet for bethany.

long time,

yes, i am home. and im very happy to be..
i havent used this is a while but Bethany is trying her hardest to get me in communication mode with the outside world so:
update
i will be 3 months officially on sat. for those who dont know i am pregnant with child. The first 3 months have been filled with dilemmas, stress, morning sickness and weight loss. So far i have lost 15 pounds which i blame on the morning sickness. Ironically, i fit better in my clothes now then when i did a few weeks ago, which I wont be able to say a few weeks from now since thats when the baby will be showing. My next appointment is on the 14th and hopefully its an ultrasound appt. Ultrasounds are the most amazing things. When I had my first one i yelled holy shit really loud, to my christian OBGYN. It was funny, but there's a huge difference between seeing a pink plus sign on a pee stick and seeing a baby move around with a fast and healthy heartbeat. I am excited to see what God has for me and this baby in the future. For now I am focused on simplifyin my life, and becoming the best person I can be for this child. I will write more soon and yes Bethany put some belly pictures up.. I am showing a little..but I seriously think i had this stomcah before. haha